Old Memories

I just sent Jube up to bed and he went quite angelically for a change—even if I do still here bumping noises coming from above. As he went, I had a flashback to my sixth birthday.

On that day, our house was filled with a bunch of women, working on some project if I remember right. Was it sewing circle? I can’t remember. I just remember that my great aunt Eva was there and she praised me for going up to take a nap without complaining. But before that happened, on that same day, Grandma Ruth handed me a clear plastic bag and inside was a white, smiling, stuffed monkey with long arms and legs. I was nearly paralyzed with delight. I remember being speechless for a bit. Grandma laughed in her comfortable way at me. So that was what I remembered when I sent Jube up for his nap.

And then I had to think some more about that monkey. Soon after that birthday, Jacob and I started learning to read together, my mom teaching at our house. It was fun, but I soon learned that I had to hide Floppy Monkey, or Jacob would treat him most disgracefully. If the monkey happened to be on the floor, Jacob would stand just next to it and then leap into the air and come down on him with both feet planted squarely on his dear little body.

That dear monkey’s head is now a bit wobbly and coming off at one side. His body is no longer white but a dirty creamish color. He’s sitting with all of my other childhood stuffed toys out in a green hammock made from a blanket in our mini barn at Mom and Dad’s.

Also on that hammock is a big rag doll that Grandma Ruth made me. Her face is stained and hair is falling out, but she was the only doll I ever truly cared for other than the rag doll that my Great Aunt Nita made me (and I lost her, I think both Mom and I have searched high and low, but Miranda, or Mandy, seems to have disappeared). I named that big doll Heather, after my friend, Heather Kuhns, because of the red hair, you see. I have been jealous of Heather's beautiful hair on more than one occasion and I still wonder if I'd look good in her hair color--but I'm afraid I'm stuck with my own brown hair for now.

Oh, and there's the big grey teddy bear that Grandma Ruth made, too. I'm not sure if he has both eyes and a nose any more. It seems that one of those important appendages at least threatened to come off at one point. Clark had a black bear like my grey one and I was always a little sad for Clark because my bear held up to the abuse better than his did. Is his bear still around?

Thinking about those bears always makes me think of another odd memory. I have one memory of when Grandpa and Grandma moved off the farm for that short period of time. We were at Grandma's house and me and I don't know who else, went into one of the walk in closets, took all the stuffed animals out and threw them down the steps. I felt a bit wicked as I did it, wondering what Grandma would do. But I guess those poor stuffed animals just had to go regardless so down the steps they tumbled. But she didn't seem to mind too bad and she just put them all away up on the top shelf where we couldn't reach them and soon after that was when Clark and I got new teddy bears.

So this has taken two days to write. Appearances were deceiving yesterday, and Jube really didn't go to bed angelically at all. He went to sleep much sooner today and I hope he sleeps for another hour before waking. And now I shall close this rambley post. (Spell check doesn't like the world rambley, but I do, so there it is.)