The word for guava and foreigner is the same in Thai - "farang". For example: On Friday we spent time with Mae Wahn--a first for the family for months. She served green guavas. "Farang gin farang." Jube commented. There was the usual discussion about the play on words and how it may sound as though people eat people. Mae Wahn laughed--happy to have Jube back again.
How did this northern Wisconsin woman fall in love, land halfway across the world, and give birth to four children on foreign soil? In November of 2016 I went back to my Northern Wisconsin, reeling...tired and old to my bones. Two babies, back to back in the squelching hot season, along with the other pressures at the time, left me bone tired. Thirty years old - at least - and feeling every year of it.
|Four children, totally out, on the 90-minute ride between Bangkok airports.|
I watch Jube know his way around this tropical city world and marvel. How did this come to be for this child of a Wisconsin country girl? I can't process this. I can not understand it, it is too big for me.
A familiar verse says, "Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high, I cannot attain unto it." I've been stuck, trying to decide if it is wonderful or not. It's been hard work and turmoil sometimes. It happened painfully slow really fast at places and now here I am. But I'm coming out on the other side again, and it really is wonderful after all.
But I don't feel very green anymore. There is still space I need right now between me and the world--specifically, the blogging world. Putting myself out there feels vulnerable. More than that, I'm not sure that blogging is the medium I'd like to use to share what I might with the world. I need space from the internet world in general as well. One day, the Green Guava's Wife, may begin posting again. But for now, I feel more like a turtle, going into its shell.
|Sleeping at 500 mph five miles in the air requires creativity.|